1NEWS, In a state of grief, usually a person tends to be more sensitive. Therefore, if you have family, friends or relatives who are grieving the loss of a loved one, you need to be careful in how you act and say.
The reason is, the heart’s intention is to provide support, but the words that are spoken actually make them sadder and sink into grief.
Reporting from the Considerable.com page, here are some sentences that should not be said to someone who is grieving even though you often say it.
You are a strong person
Often you try to strengthen those who are grieving or lost, by telling them that they are strong people. In fact, you don’t need to say this.
According to Anne Marie Lockmyer, an author of the book “When Their World Stops: The Essential Guide to Truly Helping Anyone in Grief,” states that bereavement forces a person to appear strong, when the grieving person is feeling broken.
“We may look fine, but we’re really not. When we say they are strong, we seem to force them not to cry over the loss of a loved one. In fact, sadness is perfectly acceptable to express,” said Anne Marie, quoted from Considerable.com.
Call me if you need anything
Openly offering help when someone is grieving may be a good choice for you when you see someone grieving, but not for those who are grieving.
You may openly provide assistance but there is a possibility that they will feel reluctant when asking for help or assistance from you. For that, avoid words like this.
It’s better if you show it directly with action. For example, your relative needs money for a funeral, so you immediately take care of all the costs needed for the funeral.
He’s not suffering anymore
Many people die of long-standing illnesses and we try to give comfort with such words to those they leave behind.
Unfortunately, saying this kind of thing to those who were grieving would only hurt him. Maybe you’re saying this because you’re trying to make things right. But in fact, this sentence can add to his sadness because he feels that he is the cause of the suffering of the deceased family.